I feel duped! I am so angry right now. The devil weaseled his way back into my emotions and I'm noticing it after he's been here for about a week. I've lost 10 lbs, I've been elevated and encouraged by God, and I've been obedient to God. UGH!!!! Ok, ok I'll slow down, let me take you back about a week.
It all started last week with overeating. Well, it started with overeating lettuce; that is until lettuce called it's friends chicken fried rice, pancakes, omelets, and fried chicken (all overeaten on different days). This is detrimental to my success. I got to the point where I had to unbutton my pants to sit on the couch and watch t.v. with my husband-now you know that's bad. Then I started feeling sad and hopeless at random times. I lost my motivation to do things. I haven't worked out in over a week, but the thing that spoke red flag to me is for the last few days I've slept well over 8 hours and I've had little to no motivation to get out the bed. Normally by body automatically will wake up at exactly 8 hours of sleep&I won't be able to go back to sleep, but lately I've been forcing myself to get up and even my husband has gotten up earlier than me.
It dawned on me two days ago. Overeating, sadness, hopelessness, lack of motivation, over sleeping...these are all cookie cutter signs of depression. The devil uses things like depression to throw you off track, with the hope that you'll turn to him for refuge (by isolating, drinking, drugs, emotional eating, or whatever your vice of choice has been in the past). I have no reason to be depressed. God is so good and my life is awesome. I've battled depression most my life. I thought this was something I was done with for good. This just goes to show how the devil never gives up and neither should we ever stop seeking God's guidance, wisdom, and love to defeat the devil. I'VE DEFEATED DEPRESSION ONCE AND I'LL DO IT AGAIN!!!!!
STEP 1: Reading, repeating, and believing God's word is for me. I won't allow the devil to tell me I'm less than or that I'll never move forward. Until I get it down into the very fabric of my being, Daily I will read 2Corinthians 4:7-10; 15-18 which let's me know I am not broken, I am not defeated and I am more than a conqueror. STEP 2: Daily I will make myself get up and go and force myself to do what I'm supposed to be doing (i.e. working out, waking up, being around people, Bible study, etc.) until I'm outta this "funk". Finally STEP 3 I will remember Philippians 3:12-14 which simply stated tells me I'm not all I want to be, but I'll continue to strive to be who God wants me to be. I will be victorious and if this is something that you've struggled with be encouraged in knowing you too can be victorious.
And remember if you're a fat chic like me stay motivated, be encouraged, and know that inside of every fat chic is a skinny chic waiting to come out.
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